The Loneliness of the Long Distance 20km Walker

Osaka, Japan for the World Athletics Championships and it's all action all of the time. Even the 20km pretend-to-walk-while-really-jogging event. No, really.

20km Walk-Racing, as I believe it is correctly designated, is one of those sports on the very edge of being acceptable as a 'true' sport. It's in there with rhythmic gymnastics and synchronised swimming as something that clearly requires sporting endeavour but lacks an obvious point. Why not just do gymnastics - what's with all the balls and ribbons? Why walk if you can run?

In fact, to get around this existential dilemma, many of our walking heros do seem to decide to run anyway and hope they won't get caught. The secret appears to jog along but try and waddle enough to fool the on-course judges that you are indeed walking. Just very, very seriously.

Unfortunately for some in Sunday's race their waddling was not enough to avoid receiving the dreaded second warning and then expulsion. The judges seem to spring from the side of the course and suddenly point a red card at the ambling offender, who waddles on for a few more yards as momentum and realisation come to a collision, and then drops away and off. It must be hard to walk back to the changing rooms at this point one would have thought. Maybe they prepare wheelchairs for the stricken.

Beyond these poignant and personal dramas lay the medal chase. An Ecuadorian was pumping away clear in first place. If he had been wearing a tuxedo he would have appeared to be doing the cha cha cha, without a partner, in running shoes. He sachayed over the line and promptly collapsed in a fit, his legs shaking uncontrollably, which was more of a jitterbug really but the judges had already got their men and were back in the saloon playing cards and drinking Sapporo whiskey.

Meanwhile, with medics attending to our the gold medal winner, second place hove into view. Down the final stretch he came but as he approached the finish the metres seemed to get harder and harder. A Spaniard in third position was motoring away some twenty metres behind. Smoothly slipping the gears he honed in on the stuttering man in second place. He was in full jogging-but-really-really-trying-hard-to-appear-walking mode. Some of the sparse, drowsy crowd, most still sipping their first coffees of the day and leafing through their programmes, saw what was happening and started to scream. With five metres left stutterer realised something was happening, turned to gauge the threat and was left in a puff of wind, well a light zephyr of a breeze at least, as Diego zipped past and fair dipped for the line.

What drama, what courage, what suspense. If that's international race-walking then I'm a convert. The 20km Walk - it's the new curling.

When Tennis Was Cool - Back to 1970s Part II

More classic tennis pictures from 1974. I give you John Newcombe (in very cool Adidas trainers), a 17 year old Bjorn Borg, Yvonne Goolagong and Stan Smith, + a quite awful ad for Kawasaki tennis racquets - now what ever happened to them eh?

Waiting For Alonso

Qualifying Day - Hungaroring - 4th August. World champion Fernando Alonso claimed pole position for Sunday's Hungarian Grand Prix after a controversial qualifying session. Lewis Hamilton was seemingly delayed by his team-mate in the pit lane meaning he was too late for his final lap.

Alonso had come in to change tyres in time for one last flying lap, and proceeded to sit in the pit-box eating sandwiches and discussing the weather with the pit crew, while Hamilton sat revving his engine behind him. Eventually Alonso engaged gear and took off, but when Hamilton emerged from the pit-lane it was too late and the session was closed

Then, in the final seconds, the Spaniard pipped the 22yr old British rookie by 0.107 seconds, dropping him to second - and on a track notorious for lack of overtaking opportunities.

As the drivers came in after qualifying for weight-checking and interviews the TV cameras caught a steaming Ron Dennis throwing a mini-tantrum at the McLaren control point and then having whispered words with Alonso, who pointedly ignored him. This made Dennis even more livid and you could almost see the steam coming out of his ears.

Oh to be a fly on the wall in the team meeting this evening.

Its clearly been a trying week and this was the ultimate way to make the McLaren chief lose even more hair. Ferrari-gate had seen him in Paris to defend the team, increasingly strident press-conferences had seen him make some odd accusations, and now his teammates playing silly buggers in his cars.

However, his cars are 1 and 2 on the grid for the race, 1 and 2 in the world championship standings and he is leading the constructors championship. Blimey. I'd hate to see Ron Dennis when things weren't going well.